. : Author : .



Name::Rodney
From::

View my complete profile

: Fellow Passengers :

Crofton

Aaron

KC

Will

Jan

Shazza

Mkono

Lawrence

Edward

Aeryk

C$

Lee

Cordell

DeShawn

Calvin

. : The Family : .

mom, Darline

brother, George

sister, Kysee

niece, Klasiq

nephew, Jaishaun

cousin, Kali w/Kysee

. : Archives : .

08/13/05
08/14/05
08/16/05
08/20/05
08/24/05
08/25/05
08/26/05
08/28/05
08/30/05
09/04/05
09/07/05
09/08/05
09/10/05
09/11/05
09/17/05
09/19/05
09/22/05
09/23/05
09/25/05
09/26/05
09/27/05
09/28/05
09/29/05
10/02/05
10/04/05
10/11/05
10/13/05
10/18/05
10/23/05
10/24/05
10/25/05
10/26/05
11/02/05
11/03/05
11/06/05
11/14/05
11/25/05
11/27/05
11/28/05
11/30/05
12/01/05
12/04/05
12/06/05
12/11/05
12/13/05
12/17/05
12/18/05
12/19/05
12/25/05
12/27/05
01/01/06
01/02/06
01/04/06
01/06/06
01/07/06
01/08/06
01/10/06
01/14/06
01/16/06
01/19/06
01/20/06
01/23/06
01/27/06
01/31/06
02/06/06
02/08/06
02/14/06
02/26/06
02/27/06
03/06/06
03/09/06
03/18/06
03/20/06
03/22/06
03/23/06
03/28/06
03/29/06
04/04/06
04/05/06
04/06/06
04/07/06
04/14/06
04/17/06
05/04/06
05/06/06
05/10/06
05/16/06
06/06/06
06/15/06
07/01/06
07/10/06
07/24/06
08/10/06
08/16/06
08/24/06
09/25/06
09/30/06
11/15/06
11/19/06
11/24/06
11/29/06
12/21/06

. : Baggage Handlers : .


View My Stats

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Today


Last year I decided to make changes in my life. Up until then I approached things differently in regards to the people with whom I associated and the ways I elected to meet them. Before, I really didn't have a formula to measure the value that people and experiences brought to my life nor did I recognize the intrinsic value that I brought to the lives of others. I was a bit of a mess. I chose to attend a mountain retreat in Maryland last October with no specific expectations. I simply believed that I would meet some decent people with similar interests and spark a friendship or two. What happened is I met the one person who has most impacted my adult life.
I'd never been in love before. I don't mean that as an insult to an ex that might be a reader of this blog because I loved you as much as I could without loving myself wholly and completely. For most of my life I struggled with emotional baggage that I carried around and sat in the corner of each relationship. The bags served as a constant reminder of my unresolved issues and my reluctance to address them. By late 2003 I was rolling around one of those hotel luggage racks. A 2004 New Years resolution was to start unpacking baggage. However, it wasn't an aggressive effort. Still, by my birthday, I had modified enough behaviors that I was accepting and loving me for me and noticing a difference in my interactions.
By the time the retreat rolled around I knew that I was in a better place emotionally than I had been before. One of the indicators was that I was able to openly and honestly discuss some aspects of my personality that I never really acknowledged before. Because I never acknowledged and addressed them in the past, the same issues would reappear to damage (sometimes irreparably) each relationship. It was really interesting and refreshing to meet someone with whom I could discuss my low traits without fear of judgement. I had gotten myself to the place where I knew another person's judgement of me was their issue to work out so I was able to be frank about things. I immediately felt in my spirit that this person was to be very special to me. I just didn't realize how much.
Over the course of this past year we have ridden a rollercoaster that has taken us to our highest and lowest points and looped us around quite a bit. Things didn't look so good at times, but I never lost sight of the fact that I had met the person with whom I wanted to share my life. I never allowed myself to imagine that things wouldn't work out. We both worked hard on this one and our persistence has paid off. We are celebrating a year of sharing and learning. Of the greatest things I have learned is that we are both works in progress on a fluid canvas and I want us together at the last brushstrokes.

Posted by Rodney :: 8:22 PM :: 5 Comments:

Post or view comments

---------------------------------------------

Featured Quote

Never make someone a priority when you are only an option for them.

. : On the Journey : .

. : On Another Journey : .

Mattie Watkins 1930-2006

Leroy Whitfield 1969-2005

Frankie Warren 1921-2005

Willie Snell 1925-2003

Clayton Jackson 1974-2001

. : Credits : .

Blogger
Template By Caz